* * *

Working the third-shift, the graveyard-shift, has certain benefits. That is if you don't need much sleep and all of your friends and family work the night-shift too -- or, if you happen to be anti-social.

For one thing, the third-shift, in most cases, is smaller than the day-shift. In my case, it's just me. I'm all alone. No boss looking over my shoulder. As long as the reports are printed and the computer system is still functioning in the morning, nobody really cares how I go about it. (Another nice thing about being alone is that I can turn up the stereo as far as the speakers can stand when they play a good song on the radio.)

And for another thing ... well, I can't think of another selling point right now, but at first the sacrifice seemed to be worthwhile. Now, I'm not so sure. I would have to be offered some serious cash to even consider another night job. The lousy 20 cents hourly "night differential," serves more as insult than incentive.

The summertime is the worst. As if sleeping on a hot, humid day isn't hard enough, schools are out for the summer. Kids yelling and screaming; making all kinds of racket.

Our bedroom is on the east side of the house. This time of year, the sun shines on that side all morning. By noon it's got to be like 200 degrees or so in there. Even the waterbed is sweating -- or so it seems sometimes -- when I wake-up with the damp sheets glued to my perspiring skin.

While I find it much easier to sleep during the winter months, it is quite depressing when it is dark outside both going to, and coming from work. But then again, it can be just as depressing to see a beautiful day that I am missing out on as I try to relax in a nearly futile attempt to fall asleep.

Now that the rest of the company has moved to Mosinee, there are plenty of rooms available at One Wausau Center. I've thought about getting a cot and just staying there. But upon further contemplation, I realized that I'd be risking total insanity.

My work schedule has changed many times over the last seven and a half years. When I first started this job, November 6, 1989, it wasn't bad at all. It was only three days per week, which allowed me to continue working my part-time job at NTC.

A couple of years ago, when downsizing had begun to take it's toll, my hours, as well as days per week, began to increase.

It grew harder and harder to switch from a night to a daytime schedule. Juggling the two jobs was becoming more and more difficult.

When it got to be too much, a decision had to be made. I very regretfully quit my part-time job at the end of 1995. At that point, I thought that I could put more time into my wife, family and friends, and my music. Boy was I wrong.

In June of '96 when our other night operator quit, my workload increased even more. I was back to working more than sixty hours per week, only now those hours were to be spent mostly in solitude.

It was also at that time, about a year ago, that I grudgingly quit rehearsing for what would have been my second rock band.

I have sacrificed far too much for far too little. For the past year, I have done little other than work and sleep, and search the internet for a solution to my dilemma.

I now am living my life 180 degrees out of phase with the rest of the world. AM, and Pm, have been reversed. If I never looked outside, I would probably forget which was which.

Strange how I once preferred the night shift. Nice and quiet, left to do my work with only a few interruptions. Now it's too quiet. I need -- crave -- interaction. I feel like a caged animal. Not really knowing what I'll do once out of my cage ... I just want out.